Oliver Willis Declares Himself Sexy, Father Of Jessica Alba’s Baby

10:48 pm EST October 9th, 2008 | News | 12 Comments

I too thought the story about Sarah Palin issuing a report absolving herself was an Onion headline the first time I saw it. I’m still having a hard time believing that someone in the real world created such a thing and sent it out with a straight face.

Adam Savage of Mythbusters (one of my favorite shows) explains the line of thought here:

“I reject your reality and substitute my own”

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12 Responses to “Oliver Willis Declares Himself Sexy, Father Of Jessica Alba’s Baby”

  1. Erik says:
    October 10, 2008 at 1:00 am

    Well that answers all the questions then, doesn’t it? Sarah is totally clean, has never fibbed, said Thanks but no thanks and a wink, wink, wink.

    Part of me thinks the McCain camp is doing some of this stuff for fun since they know they are going to get creamed. But that would mean that they had a sense of humor.

  2. Mylegacy says:
    October 10, 2008 at 1:13 am

    Sarah, Sarah, pants on fire.

    Actually, she had a “Personnel Committee” in Alaska do an “internal” investigation. All three members of the Committee were people SHE had put in the Personnel Department.

    Democracy, ya gotta love it.

    Of great interest to me was her stopping Trooper Wooten from appearing at the State Fair dressed in the “Safety Bear” costume – a mascot of the Alaskan State Police. BECAUSE – she wanted to go to the Fair and didn’t want to see Wooten there EVEN if dressed as a bear. I’m surprised she didn’t let him come then shoot him from a helocopter – you know – giving him a sporting chance – her being such a swell sport an’ all.

  3. Mylegacy says:
    October 10, 2008 at 1:17 am

    “Oliver Willis Declares Himself Sexy, Father Of Jessica Alba’s Baby”

    Oliver, you sly old fox you! Shit, I didn’t even you knew the lady! So that’s what you been up to when you weren’t blogging!

  4. Parthenon says:
    October 10, 2008 at 1:36 am

    And parody is officially obsolete.

    This woman has got some onions, I’ll tell you that. I thought the campaign suspension was a trick play. This one’s more like that time in the 20s when a dude stood on another dude’s shoulders to make the catch in the end zone.

  5. Matt says:
    October 10, 2008 at 5:27 am

    Parthenon,

    That actually happened? I thought it was just in a Three Stooges short.

  6. anotherbozo says:
    October 10, 2008 at 7:43 am

    “Oliver Willis Declares Himself Sexy, Father Of Jessica Alba’s Baby”

    Oliver, I just BET you’ve got some mash notes in your mailbox, the net being what it is. They prolly sent revealing pix too. I say PUBLISH!

  7. David21009 says:
    October 10, 2008 at 8:49 am

    Oliver, you motorboatin’ SOB you! Are they built for speeed or comfort?

  8. jr says:
    October 10, 2008 at 9:58 am

    Moosalini’s Narcissistic personality disorder knows no bounds

  9. PG says:
    October 10, 2008 at 10:07 am

    Where can one find this internal report? I checked the McCain campaign website and didn’t spot it. They’re busy being excited that they could find 99 Republican Ambassadors plus Mark W. Erwin (who has given tens of thousands to Republican candidates — $9000 to Sue Myrick alone — but was an ambassador to some islands under Clinton) to endorse McCain.

  10. Quaker in a Basement says:
    October 10, 2008 at 10:21 am

    They’re busy being excited that they could find 99 Republican Ambassadors… to endorse McCain.

    Best of all, one of those ambassadors runs the foundation that funded (dun dun DUHHH!) the Chicago Annenberg Challenge!

  11. Parthenon says:
    October 10, 2008 at 10:29 am

    Matt–

    That actually happened? I thought it was just in a Three Stooges short.

    According to eyewitnesses, including one coach whose identity I’ve forgotten (It might have been Curly Lambeau). There’s no film or photographic evidence. The Stooges were either inspired or got a good idea around the same time as that eligible tackle and tight end.

  12. liberalrob says:
    October 10, 2008 at 1:54 pm

    “I reject your reality and substitute my own” is a line from the execrable 1980′s film The Dungeonmaster.

    http://www.spoonyexperiment.com/rants/Dungeonmaster/