Don’t Do It, Joe Gibbs

8:00 am EST August 30th, 2007 | Uncategorized | 7 Comments

Joe Gibbs

In order for the Washington Redskins to be successful in 2006-7 they need to score points. For the Redskins to score points, it is ideal that the following four players be as healthy as humanly possible. In order:

1. Jason Campbell (QB)
2. Clinton Portis (RB)
3. Santana Moss (WR)
4. Ladell Betts (RB)

And yet, I read this in today’s paper:

After injuring his left knee in the Washington Redskins’ second preseason game on Aug. 18, quarterback Jason Campbell is set to start tomorrow night in the team’s preseason finale at Jacksonville. Meanwhile, tailback Clinton Portis, who has missed nearly all of training camp with tendinitis in his right knee, returned for yesterday’s practice and also could play, Coach Joe Gibbs said.

There is no need for the starting QB and RB to play in today’s game. The game means nothing. There is no upside to playing them and exposing them to even the possibility of harm. The first game that counts is 10 (!) days away. In addition to me hating the preseason, did you know that God hates it too? You’re a very religious man Coach Gibbs, so you can’t have thought it was a coincidence that last Saturday’s game versus the Ravens was interrupted by a thunderstorm by accident?

That was a sign: The Lord Hateth The Preseason.

What should be done is for the four aforementioned players to be sealed in protective Nerf-like spheres and locked away from the world until the night of the 8th. It’s the right thing to do. Don’t play them.

Please.

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7 Responses to “Don’t Do It, Joe Gibbs”

  1. mg says:
    August 30, 2007 at 9:10 am

    Jason Campbell’s performance last year did not convince me he can be trusted to go without preseason reps. Take those burgandy and gold blinders off. He ain’t no messiah. He still needs as much work as he can get.

  2. Retired Catholic says:
    August 30, 2007 at 11:10 am

    Well, Oliver, Norval is protecting LT and Rivers, with the starters going ten plays. If this blows up in Gibbs’s face, perhahps you’ll be less harsh in your judgment of Mr. Turner. I think us Charger fans will be happier with Norv than you poor unfortunates will be with Joe. Nobody has had much success there, or in Oakland either, for quite some time. San Diego will open the season 2-0. The Skins?

  3. Oliver Willis says:
    August 30, 2007 at 11:18 am

    Joe Gibbs would have to lose continuously for 10 years straight to match Norv’s record for futility. Joe Gibbs just showing up for work makes him already 1,000x better of a coach than sorry Norv Turner.

  4. OxyCon says:
    August 30, 2007 at 12:09 pm

    Who is Portis’ back-up?
    He better be good!

    Go E-A-G-L-E-S! EAGLES!

    (us Eagles fans are the smartest fans, because we know how to spell)

  5. Oliver Willis says:
    August 30, 2007 at 12:17 pm

    Portis’ backup is Ladell Betts, who ran for 1,154 yards last year. He could probably start for about half of the league. So, not worried.

  6. HumboldtBlue says:
    August 31, 2007 at 8:02 pm

    Come on Joe, do it, they’re just like your NASCAR drivers, who never seem to get hurt in what are amazing crashes. So don’t worry Joe, just play all of your starters for four quarters, it won’t make a damned bit of difference because the Skins aint gonna win more than five games anyway.

    Danovan McNabb, filling in for HumboldtBlue

  7. HumboldtBlue says:
    August 31, 2007 at 8:04 pm

    “(us Eagles fans are the smartest fans, because we know how to spell)”

    umm… considering I just misspelled Donovan’s first name, well … ummm … uhhh